125. Strengthening Relationships Through Conflict

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling Teen Before, During and After Treatment

Sometimes the shame around my actions feels so heavy and I feel like I’ve failed as a parent. Sounds familiar? In this deeply personal episode, I open up about one of the most painful regrets I’ve had as a parent. A moment I carried shame around for years. It was a time when I was overwhelmed with emotions and lacked the tools I have now, leading to choices I’m not proud of.
At the time, I was convinced my struggling teen was doing everything “wrong” and my attempts to “fix” him only deepened the divide between us. Looking back, I realize that while his choices weren’t ideal, mine weren’t either. That realization was hard to face, but it set the stage for something even more powerful: repair.
“We can have a better, stronger relationship by having conflict and then repairing, than if there was never any conflict.” - Beth Hillman
Repairing the relationship with my son didn’t happen overnight. In fact, it took years. But through a meaningful conversation with him recently, I learned something profound: conflict doesn’t have to weaken a relationship. In fact, repairing after conflict can lead to a deeper, stronger bond than if the conflict had never occurred at all.
In this episode on strengthening relationships through conflict, I reflect on:

• The intense emotions that drove my actions and how I’ve worked to process and release the shame;
• How repairing with myself was a crucial first step before I could repair with my teen;
• The lessons my son and I learned about conflict, repair, and resilience through our journey.

If you’ve ever felt like you’ve failed as a parent, this episode is a reminder that it’s never too late to repair, rebuild, and reconnect with your teen. It’s a process, and sometimes it takes time, but it’s always worth it.
Looking for support?
🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!
🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.
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And remember parents, the change begins with us.