Ep #75: Needed to Hate You to Love Me

Wannabe Balanced | MINDSET Coach

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Uncuffed

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S4, E1 - Day One 7:38

4 weeks ago7:38

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7:38

Last summer, something monumental happened. One of Uncuffed's founding producers, Greg Eskridge, came home after more than 30 years in prison. In this episode we’ll bring you back to that emotional day last summer when he walked out of the San Quentin gates, free at last. Our work in prisons is supported by the California Arts Council, the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation, independent foundations, and donations from listeners like you. Learn more, sign up for Uncuffed news, and support the program at www.weareuncuffed.org Follow us @WeAreUncuffed on Instagram and Facebook Transcripts are available within a week of the episode coming out at www.kalw.org/podcast/uncuffed…

5 years ago 26:21

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"You promised the world and I fell for it
I put you first and you adored it
You set fires to my forest
And you let it burn
Sang off key in my chorus
Cause it wasn’t yours
I saw the signs and I ignored it
Rose colored glasses all distorted
You set fire to my purpose
And I let it burn
You got off on the hurtin’
When it wasn’t yours
We’d always go into it blindly
I needed to lose you to find me
This dancing was killing me softly
I needed to hate you to love me..."
~ Selena Gomez

159 episod

Ep #75: Needed to Hate You to Love Me

Wannabe Balanced | MINDSET Coach

published 5 years ago

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159 episod

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Ep #161: 1 Year No Social Media {Life Update} 14:53

44 weeks ago14:53

14:53

It’s been almost one year since I last recorded a podcast and since I stopped posting on social media. This wasn’t necessarily intentional by the way. My plan was to take the summer off from everything so I could focus a little more on other things for a while. But when September rolled around I found myself not wanting to come back to podcasting and social media, which was strange. I’d always been rearing to get back to work as soon as the kids went back to school. But this year was different. This was the first summer I didn’t post at all and I never once checked Facebook. It was like I got to go back in time, back before cell phones and social media. And I found it to be so incredibly refreshing. No more constantly worrying about taking pictures and videos for my next post. In fact, I didn’t really take any pictures and videos this year besides our vacation and holidays. It was so unlike me. I got to see what it was like to just live my life, going with the flow, having no big plans. Just simple and present. Something I haven’t felt in well over a decade. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve loved creating videos and podcasts over the years, but I just needed a nice long break, kinda like a sabbatical I guess.…

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Ep #160: Season's Ending, New Beginnings, & Letting Go 14:20

2 years ago14:20

14:20

Seasons come, seasons go… switch things up and ride the flow. Being consistent with what you’re doing in pursuit of your goals does not mean you do the same thing every day. You must learn how to align with the seasons & switch things up in order to experience FLOW. When each season comes to a close we tend to experience momentary boredom or even a bit of anxiety or depression. Feeling uninspired or unmotivated. When the energy of one season shifts to the next we may notice feelings of exhaustion or overwhelm if not in the habit of aligning with the seasons. This is the moment to go inward, avoid distracting yourself from this uncomfortable feeling. If you wait long enough you’ll become receptive to a new energy. A fresh new creative outlook will emerge. New ideas, new projects, new focus. During this transition stage it’s important to listen up to what your inner energy is gravitating towards. Is it time to let some things go? Set something aside for a SEASON? Is it time to shift your focus to more play and less work? More creating and less consuming? More rest and less rushing? There’s a time to work and a time to play. A time to rest, and a time to exert yourself. Spring is coming to a close and Summer is around the corner. Ask yourself, what needs to change as the seasons change? For me, my entire calendar gets a make over. I’m shifting from content creation via my podcast, social media, and the MINDSET classes, to more home projects and kid focus. Seasons are what keeps life so fun and interesting. Always something to look forward to. Embrace the ebbs to release the intelligent flow of life. Alignment means awareness of when to pivot, or when to let go. Right now I’m switching up my rituals and routines. Wrapping up Spring and gearing up for Summer. From producing to reducing. Less work, more fun. Less online time to more outside time. Contemplation and plant propagation. Decluttering and Gardening Workouts and writing… What’s your focus going to be this summer? P.S. I have room to take on a few more clients if you've been needing help with managing your time, or managing your emotions. I'm here for yah! Schedule an appointment now before my summer slots fill up. https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/1-hour-coaching-session…

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Ep #159: HEALING | Mind, Body, & Soul 47:05

2 years ago47:05

47:05

Let’s take a look at your symptoms, physical AND mental. Do you have any pain in your body? Extra weight? Skin conditions, thinning hair? Are you dealing with any anxiety or depression? What ever the symptom is, there is always a root cause and that’s what I hope tonights class can help you identify. With my rash I explored all potential causes. Through deep introspection and researching breast implant illness, I was able to narrow it down. When I began reading about breast implant illness and discovered countless stories of other women experiencing the same symptoms as me, I was convinced that my next step towards better health should be to remove my implants. I also made sure to look at my mental and emotional health during this time. I even went back and read some of my journal entries leading up to the rash outbreak. I noticed a theme in my writings. RESENTMENT. I was carrying a lot of resentment in my body, thinking I was processing it by writing it out. But writing alone is not always enough. Sometimes you need to SAY something rather than hold it in. Sometimes it’s necessary to voice how you’re feeling, what you’re upset about, set some boundaries and make some changes. {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.} If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session…

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Ep #158: Lose Yourself | Post Explant Surgery Mindset 30:28

2 years ago30:28

30:28

Not gonna lie, seeing my smaller chest for the first time was emotional. I broke down in tears, but quickly shifted back to acceptance. Now I see them as an elegant beauty rather than hot sexy. Both versions are awesome, so I'm choosing to embrace my new look. Focusing on what was gained rather than what was lost. They don’t look perfect, but even without the implants, I’m not going to be able to stop the process aging. Letting go of resistance I have to my body changing with time, and the belief that I reached my peak of beauty. Redefining what beauty means to me. Getting it out of my head that youth is the only kind of beauty. I started paying more attention to the beauty of deep wisdom that only comes with AGE. The lines and wrinkles represent experience and a life LIVED. Seeing less and less of my external beauty and more and more of my internal beauty. Seems cliche to say that, but like in the movie, I feel Pretty, when you FEEL pretty, that’s all you really need in order to be happy and content. We feel pretty by how we think and what we believe. {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}\ If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session…

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Ep #157: Organize Your Mind & Your LIFE 1:05:01

2 years ago1:05:01

1:05:01

One of my specialties is organizing. It’s something I’m naturally good at, but also something I often promote because of the incredible benefits it can have on the brain. Having things neat and orderly is extremely important to me. My kids don’t always love it though. I try to impress upon them the benefits of a clean room and a made up bed, but they just think I’m a bit of a perfectionist. I tried for years to get my oldest to make her bed each day and she’d always say, why, nobody is going to see it . I’d be so offended that she actually thought I wanted her to make her bed for OTHER people. I wanted her to make her bed for me, haha, but I was also hoping she’d experience the same sense of satisfaction I get when I walk by her room and see it all neat and tidy. It has everything to do with me, haha. I recognized early on in my life the positive affects a clean and organized space had on my brain so it’s something that has always been a priority for me. There’s nothing better than coming down to a clean kitchen first thing in the morning, or climbing into my neatly made up bed at night. I do it for my brain. I used to think it was just a personality thing. I know messes don’t bother everyone, but I’ve come to learn that clutter and disorganization can have plenty of negative affects on all people, it’s not just me. Some may not even realize the stress, overwhelm, and fatigue they often feel, could be directly related to chaos and clutter. It’s not just a personality type thing, it’s a human thing. {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}\ If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session…

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Ep #156: Creativity for Problem Solving & Manifesting More of What You Want 47:29

2 years ago47:29

47:29

When we hear the word creative, we often think of artsy people who spend their days painting or writing songs and poetry. But creativity is one of THE most powerful energies we can all access. This energy is not just for the people who we deem as creatives, but it’s available to ALL of us. Not for the sole purpose of creating art per se, but it can be used in our every day lives for creative problem solving, inspired ways of extracting what we want out of life, and innovatively contributing to the collective evolution. WE ARE ALL CREATIVE How many of you would consider yourself creative? Well guess what, we are ALL creative. It’s in our very nature to create. We literally create LIFE. We are designed to procreate, cocreate, and recreate. Allow others creative work to inspire your own. Maybe you’d like to recreate a song that has already been written by changing the lyrics to match your life experience. Or rewrite the narrative to a well known fairy tale. When it comes to using creativity in our every day life, maybe it looks more like rewriting the narrative to your past. Thinking outside the box when it comes to the belief system you inherited from your parents. Or simply coming up with a plan to get out debt, move to your dream destination, or turning your passion into a profession. For me, I especially love to create organized and cozy living spaces. I also enjoy formulating new recipes, rituals, and routines. Recipes for healthy meals and also recipes for personal development. I love creating new systems and formulas within my life coaching practice to improve mental health and well being. Everything that has already been created is like additional colors to your pallet. You are the artist and your brain is the paint brush. What picture do you want it to create using all the colors you have available to you. Adding someone else’s colors to your masterpiece is not imitating, it’s innovating. Sometimes the most brilliant inventions come from combining 2 or 3 things that already exist. That’s exactly how ER Shred was born. We combined different dietary approaches then made a few enhancements in order to create a sustainable and effective protocol. We limitate when we imitate. Because it’s in our nature to create AND evolve, we should always have an innovators mind. How can we expand upon what we already know? If we hope for each generation to be better than the last, we must live in constant curiosity. Always asking questions. Questions are at the root of innovation. {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}\ If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep #155: Explant Surgery | Saying Goodbye to my Boobs in PURSUIT of Health 27:31

2 years ago27:31

27:31

In 2 weeks I am officially bidding my boobies farewell. It's been an extremely emotional decision but I'm ready to let them go in pursuit of better health. As many of you know I've been struggling with skin issues for years. This last fall I had an alarming outbreak that caused me to look deeper into what might have contributed to this horrific rash that practically covered my entire body. I went to 2 different doctors, even had a biopsy, but neither one of them could give me an answer as to what might have been the cause. I went down a rabbit hole of information, searching for potential causes which landed me at Breast Implant Illness. After reading countless stories of other women who shared many of my same symptoms, I'm hopeful that getting my breast implants removed will be the answer. Or at least another step closer to better health. The last 5 years have truly been a process of ELIMINATING all the toxic things from my life. It started with eliminating a toxic belief system (leaving my religion), which then led to eliminating toxic foods (ER Shred), and now working on eliminating toxic cleaning products, toiletries, make up, and so forth. It only seems natural to consider my breast implants being another source of toxicity that my body can no longer tolerate. {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}\ If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep #154: My Addiction to the "Sean Drug" | Codependency & Self Worth 57:29

2 years ago57:29

57:29

I didn’t know I was codependent until about 2 years ago when Sean "Ferberized" me. For most of our marriage Sean was my source of feeling good about myself. He always made me feel loved, cherished, sexy, safe, and valued. I’d often say, "boy Sean, I wish I could just see myself through your eyes". It’s like pure ecstasy to be loved and seen by Sean. But the only problem was, I got addicted to the "Sean drug" and eventually became dependent on it. He became my main source of feeling good about me, which as you can imagine is extremely exhausting for anyone to carry that kind of expectation and responsibility. Sean got to a point in our marriage where he tired of me constantly needing him to fill my cup. He knew that the only way we would get out of this unhealthy never ending cycle, was for him to allow me to “cry it out”. So in a sense, I had to go through a detox period and experience all the withdrawals. The pain that comes when ever you’re trying to beat an addiction. I had to learn to self soothe... {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.} If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep #153: Making Peace w/ Relationships That Have Ended 7:52

2 years ago7:52

7:52

We've all had our fair share of painful relationships and break ups. What if we could talk to the higher self version of the person we "broke up" with. I imagined us high fiving back stage somewhere. Congratulating each other on a job well done. “Out standing performance” I say. You really taught me some valuable lessons. That all felt so real. I was so in character that I completely lost touch with reality… {Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.} If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep #152: I have some CONFESSIONS to make 23:56

2 years ago23:56

23:56

I have some confessions to make… For some reason the podcast feels like a safer space to be more open and raw. Maybe because I know that the people who take the time to listen are the ones who truly resonate with what I'm sharing. So you listeners, thank you! I’ve attempted to be real open and raw on Facebook and Instagram and it didn’t always go over well. I guess you can say that I’m a little trigger shy now that I’ve tested those waters. Confession. The word confession has always been a very scary word for me until I hit the age of about 38, I’m almost 42 now . My entire life I feared ever having to go talk to my bishop to “confess my sins”. When I was 10 years old I had a traumatic experience, I was completely engulfed in shame by this horrific event. At the time I had no idea what to do with it. I was so scared of anyone knowing about this, but was literally dying inside with my secret. An entire year later I mustered up the courage to tell my mom. I still remember the overwhelming fear I had. Driving in the car with just my mom and I. My body shaking, palms sweaty, and tightness in my stomach. I couldn’t carry my secret any longer. It felt like poison in my body, slowly eating away at my insides. I had to purge! I blurted out, “mom, I think I... {Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.} If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only) MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep. #151: Depression | DEEP REST from the Character You're Trying to Play 28:52

2 years ago28:52

28:52

"Depression is your body saying, fuck you. I don't want to be this character anymore. I don't want to hold up this avatar you've created in the world. It's too much for me." ~Jim Carrey Everything was going great, I was on top of the world, ready to take on 2023... Then I saw her coming my way, I tried to hide so she couldn’t see me. I ducked, I pretended I didn’t see her, but nope. She spotted me with her petrifying gaze and under her spell I went. This past week I encountered my least favorite emotion, her name is DEPRESSION. She often accompanies me during the winter season of my menstrual cycle. Although I can usually expect her to arrive pretty consistently, sometimes she does’t come at all which then leads me to assume she’s gone for good. In this episode I'm sharing a sequence of recent events that triggered my inner critic which then led me in a direction that was quite enlightening. Using my winter/ hibernation season for deep rest and introspection. I'll tell you what I uncovered this month.…

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Ep #150: Is Your Brain a Dog or a Cat? 1:10:14

2 years ago1:10:14

1:10:14

We often hear people describe our inner chaos and continuous thoughts as our “monkey minds”. But tonight I want to teach you about your Dog Brain. Allow me to explain… So the dog brain. Let’s call it a Golden Retriever. Golden retrievers are a breed of dog that we know are highly intelligent and for many reasons are the dog of choice as the star in many of those feel good movies. When I think of a Golden Retriever, I think loyal, happy, playful, eager to please companions. Golden Retrievers are extremely smart and quick learners which is why this breed is commonly used for search and rescue and as service dogs. So, there is a part of our brain called the reticular activating system. This is our filter, our lens in which we perceive the world. It looks for and finds information that validates our current belief system. Language is what influences the R.A.S. Once it’s activated by the language, it goes on a search and edit mission. Searches for more of these things and edits out the rest. So just like the Golden Retriever, our R.A.S, when given a command, or SCENTence, it can be trained to search, retrieve, and rescue.…

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Ep #149: How to QUIT Sugar, Alcohol, or Coffee 30:24

2 years ago30:24

30:24

I’ve attempted to quit plenty of things over my lifetime, as we all have . But ever since 2020 I’ve discovered an entirely new level of discipline. It’s like something suddenly clicked in my brain and I was able to conquer many of my addictions, cravings, and urges. Things I’ve kicked since 2020, sugar, gluten, coffee, alcohol, pizza, chocolate, my addiction to social media, gossiping, and much much more. Since noticing this huge shift in my ability to conquer these things, I’ve began to reverse engineer what has been happening to me, which is a lot, and I’ve actually formulated a whole process that I’m now coaching people through, but I wanted to share a small piece with you today to assist you in your resolutions for 2023. My theme this year is to become a New ME in 2023 . I started setting my intensions a few weeks ago and created a free workbook for all of you. If you’re on my email list then you should have received it, if not then you can sign up via this link: http://eepurl.com/cOWSW5 The goal with this workbook is to clearly identify the person you’re hoping to step into, then identify the specific habits you need to develop in order to embody that potential you know you have. So what I’m getting at here, is that quitting anything obviously starts with HABITS and I’m going to teach you what I’ve found to be the most effective habit forming strategy. And of course, schedule a coaching session with me if you’re needing additional help and accountability. MY CALENDAR https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS…

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Ep #148: WHO do you Wanna BE in 2023? 6:48

2 years ago6:48

6:48

I love this time of year! It's the time to COLLECTIVELY reflect on the previous year, and set our intentions for the new year. We often hear people say, "you don't need to wait until the new year to start making resolutions." I agree, it's good to take inventory throughout the year, pivot when needed, and continuously ignite your enthusiasm when it comes to your vision. So who do you wanna BE in 2023? Wannabe... this term usually has a derogatory meaning. It's how we usually describe someone who wants to be something they are NOT. Imatating or trying to be like someone else. But let's lighten this up a bit. Let's imagine the person we wanna BE, not coming from a place of lack or inferiority. Not because we are seeking attention, recognition, or admiration. But because deep down inside you KNOW your potential, and because you know you CAN be who you wanna BE. I can't wait to see you BECOME the person you wanna BE in 2023. Use these journal prompts I've created for you to provide clarity, and an opportunity for you to visualize and set your intension for the year. I’ve been spending the last couple of weeks really contemplating this question and visualizing my entire next year. I actually really enjoy this process of setting my intentions and planning out my year. I also love going back and reading my journal entries this time last year. It’s fun to see what I was able to create and where I was at 1 year ago. As I’ve been getting clear on who I wanna BE in 2023, I went ahead and put together a workbook that I thought others might find useful. If you’d like me to send you this 11 page workbook then just enter your email here http://eepurl.com/cOWSW5 and I’ll email it to you. {If you’re already on my list, then you will be getting the workbook in your inbox this week} Also, schedule a mini session with me if you’d like to know more about how I can help you in 2023. https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session…

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Ep #147: Navigating Difficult Emotions During the Holidays 55:52

2 years ago55:52

55:52

This time of year, although magical, can also be an extremely difficult time for many. For various reasons it can trigger unresolved childhood trauma, loneliness, and of course financial stress and overwhelm. So my intention for tonights call is to hold space for the loneliness, trauma, and stress, as we gently direct our focus towards healing, growth, and freedom from the past. About a month ago I broke out in this horrible rash. I was so discouraged because I’d like to believe that I’m pretty healthy and that I do what it takes to maintain optimal health. Many of us have seen tremendous results with our health and wellbeing thanks to the ER Shred protocol. But our diets can only take us so far. It can’t cure our emotional wounds. It can be a stepping stone and create a HUGE breakthrough, but it’s only a 3rd of the equation when we’re talking about holistic health. As much as I teach that health is not just about what we eat, it’s also about how well we’re able to manage our minds and emotions, this piece to the puzzle just seemed to slip past my awareness when I broke out in a rash. My first response was to blame my diet, thinking, what am I doing wrong. What supplement do I need? What should I start eating or stop eating. I skipped right past the obvious, and my focus went directly to my diet instead of looking at my stress levels and emotional health. We must always be aware of the whole, body, mind, and soul. Sometimes we need a little nudge from the people who know us best. Thank you Sean for encouraging me to look deeper. {Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.}…

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