EP 58 –From Pushover to Powerhouse: How Setting Boundaries Transformed My Life as an Autism Mom

Thriving Moms of Autistics

Hi Moms! One of the biggest challenges moms of autistics encounter is the perceptions of others.

When I was trained 30 years ago, autism was understood and treated quite differently.

There's no denying that research has made significant strides in understanding and diagnosing autism.

We know more about its prevalence and have developed better tools for identification. However, this knowledge hasn't always translated to public understanding.

And that’s okay! None of us knows everything, right?

The gap between research and public understanding is a major barrier for families with autistic children.

Misconceptions and stereotypes persist, leading to judgment, social isolation, and difficulty accessing necessary support.

Even in everyday situations like grocery shopping or school settings, moms of autistic children encounter these misunderstandings.

It's not uncommon to face judgmental stares, unsolicited advice, or even outright discrimination.

In this episode, I focus on empowering moms of autistic children with practical tips for setting clear and effective boundaries with others.

Find the full transcript for this episode at www.thrivingmomsofautistics.com/58

Please share the podcast with other moms to help them grow in their autism journey. You can also do this by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. I appreciate you!

If you go to my website and scroll down the home page, you will see “topics” on the lower left side at the bottom. Click on “Self-Care.”

Why Boundaries Are Essential for Moms of Autistics

Setting boundaries with others is tricky but crucial. Whether it's family, friends, or even strangers, saying "no" and protecting your child's needs can be challenging.

But fear not, fellow mamas, I’m here to equip you with the tools and strategies you need to navigate these situations with confidence.

As moms of young autistic children, we face unique challenges. Our children may have sensory processing difficulties, communication differences, and social anxieties.

This can lead to situations where other adults, even well-meaning ones, might not understand or respect our child's needs.

Boundaries are essential for creating a safe and supportive environment for you and your child. Setting boundaries is a form of self-care. When you set boundaries with other adults, you:

• Reduce stress and anxiety
• Promote self-regulation and self-awareness
• Build trust and respect between you and your child
• Teach your child about their rights and how to advocate for themselves

When to Set Boundaries, You Support You and Your Child

Consider some of these common scenarios:

1. Unwanted physical contact: Imagine a well-meaning relative wanting to hug your child tightly, even though you know they prefer gentle touches. How do you politely say no?

2. Sensory overload: You're at a birthday party with loud music and flashing lights. Your child starts showing signs of sensory overload. How do you create a calm space for them without offending the host?

3. Overstimulating interactions: A friend's child is constantly touching and talking to your child, who becomes overwhelmed and withdrawn. How do you kindly redirect the interaction without causing hurt feelings?

4. Unrealistic expectations: A medical provider pressures your child to "be more social" or "act like other kids." They demand that they focus, stop that, or make eye-contact. How do you advocate for your child's needs and communicate their individual differences?

In each of these situations, there are ways to set clear and respectful boundaries while sti