350: Why Validation is the Missing Key to Stronger Relationships at Work with Caroline Fleck

The Modern Manager

How do you make your team members feel truly seen and heard at work?

It’s a common struggle for many managers, but this week’s guest says there’s something even more powerful than praising your team.

Joining me today is Dr. Caroline Fleck. Caroline is a licensed psychologist, corporate consultant, and an Adjunct Clinical Instructor at Stanford University. She is the author of Validation: How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life.

In this episode, Dr. Fleck explains that validation isn’t just about acknowledging someone’s work; it’s about showing genuine understanding and acceptance of them as individuals.

She also shares simple techniques that managers can use to validate their team members, especially when navigating difficult conversations or conflicts.

Plus, in the extended episode available to Podcast+ members, Dr. Fleck breaks down how validation can support behavior change.

Join the conversation now!

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Conversation Topics

• (00:00) Introduction
• (01:51) Validation vs. praise: what’s the difference?
• (04:54) The three components of validation
• (06:37) Techniques for validating when empathy is difficult
• (09:12) The impact of intuition in understanding others’ feelings
• (10:49) How to recover when you get validation wrong
• (13:09) Why validation is the most crucial quality in relationships
• (14:54) An example of validation strengthening a manager-employee relationship
• (19:06) How to validate without agreeing
• (28:02) A great manager Caroline has worked for
• (29:24) Keep up with Caroline
• (30:07) [Extended Episode Only] How to use validation to support behavior change
• (36:20) [Extended Episode Only] The power of validation in meetings

Additional Resources:

- Get the extended episode by joining The Modern Manager Podcast+ Community for just $15 per month

- Read the full transcript here

- Follow me on Instagram here

- Visit my website for more here

- Upskill your team here

- Subscribe to my YouTube Channel here

- Check out these 20 Best Team Building Podcasts here

Keep up with Caroline Fleck

- Follow Caroline on LinkedIn, Instagram, and TikTok

- Grab a copy of her book here

- Visit her website for more information here

Discount on Validation: How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life

Caroline is providing members of Podcast+ with a discount on her book Validation: How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life.

Full of captivating stories, laugh-out-loud moments, and actionable takeaways, Validation reveals how the science of seeing and being seen is the key to inner and interpersonal transformation.

To get this bonus and many other member benefits, become a member of The Modern Manager Podcast+ Community.

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The Modern Manager is a leadership podcast for rockstar managers who want to create a working environment where people thrive, and great work gets done.

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