Celebrating Holy Friendships

My Journal - Agatha Nolen

In our Spiritual Formation class for first-year M.Div. students we are reading, So Much Better: How Thousands of Pastors Help Each Other Thrive (The SPE Peer Learning Project) (2013). The early chapters of the book talk about forming peer groups of ministers and pastors who, “(1) gather around their calling; (2) make an intentional covenant for spiritual support, theological challenge and mutual accountability; (3) spend time with one another in prayer, at meals, and through travel; and (4) take what (and how) they’ve learned into their ministries. In doing so, they replicate a first-century disciple model. This kind of peer learning is sacred practice.” (p. 5)

It was exciting to read case studies of successful peer groups, particularly among women clergy, but I found myself asking on each page, “Why wait?”

My M.Div. is a hybrid program so I’m in residence at Duke University in Durham, NC for three weeks each year (one each in August, January, and May). These “intensive weeks” start our new semester and my first one was two weeks ago.

We started with a Spiritual Formation retreat on Saturday at the Chestnut Ridge Camp and Retreat Center about 25 miles from Durham. I was a little early (as usual) and had my choice of places to sit in our opening session. We were “three to a table” and I picked a table in the back. As I introduced myself to the lone occupant, I mentioned I was from Nashville and she said, “A small world; I’m from Knoxville.”

So the first person I meet is Director of worship and discipleship at a Methodist church in Knoxville!

After our opening session at the retreat, we had a choice of 3 outdoor activities for an hour. My new friend and I chose to “beautify” the campground by picking up trash. As we assembled our new group, we did introductions and met two more ladies from Tennessee, this time both in the Middle Tennessee area! One works at a Methodist Church and another for a local non-profit.

How great it was to have a group of “Holy Friendships” in the first 30 minutes!! And no need to wait until we have completed our M.Div. program. We studied together, discussed homework, ate together and worshiped together at Morning Prayer to start each day throughout intensive week. And now that we are in the Zoom portion of our classes for the rest of the semester, I get to see them each week in our classes on-line (not to mention texts in-between!)

And we’ll travel together as we’ll all be together for three weeks each year for the next four years!!

I am blessed to have found these lovely, faith-filled ladies within minutes of my arrival.

One professor said that the relationships we form may be even more important than the classes in which we’ll learn.

I think he’s right.

Blessings to my old friends and new friends,
Agatha