Liking Gap at Work-Selah105-CMAW209

Jacobs Ladder Podcast

NPR Hidden brain Interview lady Erica Boothby social illusions, liking gap, invisibility cloak illusion In conversation we overestimate negative thoughts toward us, observing we understanding how much they’re noticing us Good to ask questions Think less of us and more of them Giving compliments help dismantle liking gap for other person Just listened to a fascinating interview on NPR and thought that you would have appreciated it. The show was “Hidden Brain” and he interviewed Erica Boothby, psychologist who has identified what she called social illusions, specifically the liking gap where people tend to overestimate in conversations negative impressions they’ve made and when not in conversation underestimating how much others notice us vs us noticing them. They noted we can reduce the liking gap for others by complimenting them and for ourselves by asking others questions about thi ngs we’re worried about. Also should focus less on ourselves and more on the other person to reduce our liking gap. Speaks to power of being others focused as Bible says Phil 2:4 "Let each of you look not only his own interests, but also to the interests of others" Phil 2:3 "do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves" Rom 12:10 "Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor" 1 Cor 12:24 "Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor" Rom 12:16 "Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight" What didn’t address is importance of caring more what God thinks than others If we could truly care only what thinks and not other fallen humans, imagine how many of our challenges and worries and sadness, discontent would be gone "Psalm 56:11 "In God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?"