Episode 577: Jennifer Lopez Cancels Tour (and Something About Donald Trump)

Idiots On Parade, the Too Ugly for TV Podcast

This week, the Idiots are joined by Brandon Wein.

00:00 Introductions

00:27 Jennifer Lopez

02:51 Donald Trump

15:27 American Airlines

26:56 Tesla

32:18 Fontana Police Department

35:45 Texas Power Grid

—Jennifer Lopez had to cancel her tour due to low ticket sales. I mean, to spend time with her family. Right. Like anyone believes that.

Sorry, Jen, the arenas were empty.

—The former president was found guilty on all 34 counts he’d been charged with. May the world keep turning with no one noticing. Sure, the media calls it a big deal, but who really cares?

—Last week, we discussed the fact that scumbag lawyers for American Airlines were trying to blame a 9-year-old girl for the fact one of their flight attendants put a hidden camera in a public restroom.

Well, God be praised, something “good” happened: the bad press got American Airlines to fire that legal team.

Yes, they only did it because of press, but they did it.

Now, may those lawyers rot in hell.

Side note: for reasons unknown, we travel down paths of prison reform, the death penalty, Danny Masterson, and Ashton Kutcher.

Also, spoiler alert: nathan gives away the entire plot (and twist) of Dead Man Walking, the Sean Penn/Susan Sarandon film.

—A crybaby named Michelle Lewis wrote an exceptionally long article on how difficult it was to trade in her old Tesla for a new one.

Hey, Michelle…

Maybe walk away and buy a different car.

Side note: A Big Mac Meal supposedly costs $18, except nobody can seem to replicate that. Inflation and fast food are discussed.

—Stop me if you’ve heard this one… A man walks into a police station; “Hey, my dad is missing!”

Seventeen hours of non-stop interrogation later, he confesses to murdering his father.

But, wait for it, the dad is alive and well, and at an airport, and going on a trip!

Well, that’s what happened to Thomas Perez Jr., and now he’s going to get almost a million dollars because of it.

Sadly, that million will come from taxpayers, not the Fontana PD retirement fund.

Anyway, what an insane story.

—The Texas power grid continues to suck. When the outside temperature went up, air conditioners went on, so the power company decided to raise prices 1,600%.

Because, you know, “Private industry rules.”

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

#news #politics #jenniferlopez #donaldtrump