Falling From Grace - On Relationships

Forsaking Faith

In this episode, Heather and Christine discuss how they understand and navigate romantic relationships and sex following their deconversion.

Heather discusses how she needed to work out how to practically date someone after deconversion. She realized that people are not perfect, and it is her responsibility to determine what her deal-breakers are. Growing up, she was told that “God had the perfect man for her” so she had an unrealistic sense of what it took to meet someone romantically since she thought God would just simply make it happen. This worldview was exacerbated by the fact that she read Christian romance novels, a genre that reinforced the idea that Christian romance had a perfect fairy tale ending. Heather ends by discussing what her deal-breakers currently are.

Christine discusses the influence people in the church had on her view of relationships. One positive thing about the church was that it encouraged men to be humble, something that she still values in men today. Emotional vulnerability was also encouraged in the church and allowed men and women to have deep relationships. She discusses how this experience helped her understand the difference between emotional and physical intimacy, and she discusses her current views on respectful non-monogamy. She discusses how influential her first boyfriend was to her understandings of relationships and she also talks about how her experience losing her virginity was positive because the man she lost her virginity to knew how to treat women and how to use birth control. She ends by talking about how she has very few deal-breakers because she believes that fluidity in a relationship is important.

If you enjoy our podcast, please subscribe, rate, and review! Also, send thoughts, artwork, poetry, or other expressive media that tells a piece of your deconversion story and we will try to feature them in one of our openings or endings. These can be sent to [e-mail]. Catch you next Sunday!

Thank you for opening clips:

Courtney Stewart

and our own Heather Bailey

and we'd also like to especially thank Stars from Streetlights who waited several months for their song to be featured on our podcast which you can download here:

iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/album/heathen-feat-transit-22-single/1434009267

Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/album/70f1tPgCWzeOg4JEpyUBMa