How To Cope With The Dope podcast

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Breaking Free from People-Pleasing: Reclaiming Your Peace 32:03

7 days ago32:03

32:03

Send us a text Do you find yourself constantly putting others’ needs ahead of your own, even at the expense of your well-being? People-pleasing can be exhausting, especially when dealing with a loved one who struggles with addiction. In this episode, we explore the roots of people-pleasing, how it keeps us trapped in unhealthy cycles, and practical steps to set boundaries and prioritize self-care. Learn how to shift from seeking approval to living authentically—without guilt. Journal prompts compliments of Marijanel https://marijanel.com/blog/f/break-away-from-people-pleasing-free-journal-prompts Do I often say yes to requests or invitations, even when I don't really want to do them? And why or why not? Really asking yourself that why or why not? Question is where we dig those layers deeper into what mechanisms are inside of us that are causing us to do these things and to seek this constant approval? Do I avoid conflict or difficult conversations? Because I'm afraid of upsetting others or being rejected? Why? Or why not? How often do I prioritize other people's needs over my own work? And how does this impact my own well being and happiness? Are you happy doing this? So you essentially ask yourself, Am I happy doing this? Do I find myself constantly seeking approval and validation from others? And how does this impact my self esteem and self self worth? Am I happy doing this really events? Right now we're really evaluating and taking in inventory? What's going on inside of our hearts? How do I respond when someone asks for feedback? Or criticism? Do I avoid being honest or direct? Do I find myself over committing or feeling overwhelmed? Because I've said yes to too many things? And how do I need to set boundaries? And what boundaries could I set? What steps can I take to balance my desire to please other people with my own needs and well being? So essentially, how can I communicate my boundaries and assert myself in a healthy way? Dr. Neha Sangwan books: Powered by Me. Talk R Dr. Carly LeBaron LFMT. https://www.embracingauthenticity.org/about-me…

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Releasing Resentment: How to Do a Resentment Inventory for Healing 22:25

14 days ago22:25

22:25

Send us a text Resentment can be a heavy burden, keeping us stuck in pain, blame, and frustration. In this episode, we dive into the power of a resentment inventory—what it is, why it matters, and how it can help you break free from old wounds. Whether you're navigating relationships with loved ones struggling with addiction or just looking to let go of lingering anger, this step-by-step approach can bring clarity, healing, and peace. Tune in to learn how taking an honest look at your resentments can create space for growth, forgiveness, and personal freedom. **Resentment Inventory Worksheet** **Step 1: Identify Your Resentments** List the people, institutions, or situations you resent and why. **Who or What I Resent** | **Why I Feel Resentful** | **How It Affects Me** Example: My spouse | They continue to drink despite my efforts to help. | Self-esteem, emotional security, fear of the future. | **Reflection Questions:** - When did this resentment begin? - How has it grown over time? - How does holding onto this resentment make me feel? **Step 2: How This Resentment Impacts Me** For each resentment, consider the ways it affects different areas of your life. | **Area of My Life** | **How This Resentment Affects It** | My self-esteem | (e.g., "I feel unworthy or not good enough.") | | My relationships | (e.g., "I shut down emotionally or become controlling.") | | My peace of mind | (e.g., "I replay conversations in my head and feel anxious.") | | My physical health | (e.g., "I feel tense, have headaches, or trouble sleeping.") | **Reflection Questions:** - What emotions come up when I think about this resentment? (Anger, sadness, frustration, fear, etc.) - Is this resentment affecting people in my life who weren’t involved? (e.g., Am I lashing out at others?) ## **Step 3: My Role in the Resentment** This is about self-awareness, not self-blame. Identify any ways in which you contributed to the situation or how you continue to hold onto the resentment. | **What Was My Part in This?** | **Unrealistic Expectations?** | **Attempts to Control?** | | Example: I kept trying to make them change instead of focusing on my boundaries. | Yes, I expected them to stop drinking just because I wanted them to. | Yes, I tried to manipulate or guilt them into stopping. |**Step 4: Letting Go of Resentment** This step is about releasing the emotional burden and shifting your focus to healing. | **What I Can Accept** | **How I Can Practice Forgiveness** | **Steps to Let Go** | Example: I accept that I cannot change others, only myself. | I can pray for them (even if I don’t feel like it) or write a letter I won’t send. | I will focus on my own growth and healing instead of their choices. **Reflection Questions:** - What would my life look like if I let go of this resentment? - Can I see this person as sick, struggling, or acting from their own pain? - What healthy action can I take instead of holding onto resentment? ## **Final Reflection:** - How do I feel after working through this resentment inventory? - What is one small action I can take today to move forward? - How can I be kind to myself as I continue healing?…

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High-Functioning Codependency: Are You Too Strong for Your Own Good? 27:05

21 days ago27:05

27:05

Send us a text Do you feel like you have to handle everything yourself? Are you the one everyone relies on, even when you're drowning in stress? In this episode, we dive into high-functioning codependency —what it looks like, how it impacts your health and relationships, and why it’s so hard to recognize. We'll explore the hidden toll of constantly meeting others' needs at your own expense, the long-term effects on stress and well-being, and, most importantly, how to break free. If you've ever wondered whether your strength is actually keeping you stuck, this episode is for you. Journal prompts from Lestallion blog: Reflect on a time when you felt overly responsible for someone else's emotions. How did it make you feel, and what did you learn from that experience? Describe a situation where you neglected your own needs to please someone else. What were the consequences, and how did it affect your sense of self-worth? Think about a relationship in your life that feels unbalanced. What are the dynamics at play, and how does it impact your emotional well-being? Write about a time when you felt anxious about someone else's approval. What were you afraid of, and how did it influence your actions? Consider your boundaries . Are there any relationships where your boundaries are often crossed? How can you reinforce them more effectively? Prior episode on codependency: Episode 7 "Lets talk codependency" 4o…

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Open vs. Closed Interventions: A Conversation with a Licensed Counselor 1:00:51

28 days ago1:00:51

1:00:51

Send us a text When a loved one struggles with addiction, the question of intervention often arises—but how do you know what approach is best? In this episode, we sit down with Chuck Montante, a Certified Substance Abuse Counselor and Licensed Mental Health Counselor, to explore the differences between open and closed interventions. We discuss what makes each approach effective, common pitfalls to avoid, and how families can prepare for these difficult but necessary conversations. Whether you're considering an intervention or simply want to understand the process better, this episode offers expert insight and practical advice. Chuck Montante: 585 473-1500 Westfall Associates Rochester NY Books Mentioned: Dreamland: The True Tale of America's Opiate Epidemic by Sam Quinones In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate Intervention Messages Worksheet: 1. Your observation of their beghavior. 2. Your feelings about what you have seen. 3. How things could be different. (The message of hope.) 4. Your "bottom line". What you intend to do if they do not address the problem.…

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From Overwhelmed to Centered: Using Tapping to Calm Yourself 17:28

5 weeks ago17:28

17:28

Send us a text In this episode, we explore the powerful tool of tapping, also known as Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), to help you find calm amidst the challenges of loving someone with addiction. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stuck in a cycle of worry, tapping can provide a simple and effective way to release stress and bring yourself back to center. We’ll walk through how tapping works, why it’s especially helpful for those navigating the complexities of addiction in their relationships, and practical steps to get started today. Tune in and discover how this gentle technique can empower you to take care of yourself, no matter what chaos surrounds you. Book: The Tapping Solution by Nick Ortner…

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Enabling: When Helping Hurts 25:08

6 weeks ago25:08

25:08

Send us a text Enabling is a common yet often misunderstood behavior among the loved ones of addicts. In this episode, we dive into what enabling looks like, why it happens, and how it impacts both the addict and their family or friends. Through personal stories, insights, and practical tips, we’ll explore how to recognize enabling behaviors and shift toward healthier ways of offering support without sacrificing your well-being. Whether you're just beginning to understand this dynamic or looking for new strategies, this episode offers a compassionate and empowering perspective.…

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Building Bridges: The Power of Positive Reinforcement in Supporting a Loved One with Addiction 19:53

7 weeks ago19:53

19:53

Send us a text In this episode, we explore the transformative power of positive reinforcement when supporting a loved one with addiction. Learn how small affirmations, encouragement, and focusing on progress—no matter how small—can foster trust, promote change, and strengthen your relationship. We’ll discuss practical tips, and real-life examples. Tune in to discover how positivity can be a powerful tool in your journey toward healing and hope.…

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Interview with Kathy 58:55

8 weeks ago58:55

58:55

Send us a text In this heartfelt and inspiring episode, we sit down with Kathy, a woman whose journey through Al-Anon has transformed her life and relationships. She shares her story of finding hope, rediscovering herself, and learning how to navigate life with grace and resilience. Through her candid experiences, listeners will hear how Al-Anon has helped her heal, set healthy boundaries, and embrace meaningful connections. Whether you're new to recovery or seeking encouragement, this episode is a beacon of hope and a reminder that change is possible. reference to episode: Season 1 episode 22-Help That is Out There…

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Reflect, Reset, Renew: SMART Goals for the New Year 16:46

9 weeks ago16:46

16:46

Send us a text As the year comes to a close, it's the perfect time to reflect on your journey and set yourself up for success in the months ahead. In this episode, we explore the power of looking back to move forward, unpack the SMART goal framework, and share practical tips for crafting goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Whether you're focused on personal growth, relationships, or professional milestones, this episode will help you turn your reflections into a clear roadmap for the year to come…

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From Reflection to Renewal: Wrapping Up the Year with Purpose 18:59

10 weeks ago18:59

18:59

Send us a text As another year comes to a close, it’s time to take a step back and reflect on the different areas of your life—relationships, work, health, personal growth, and more. In this episode, we’ll work through a holistic year-end review and a way to evaluate what’s working, what’s not, and where you can find more balance. Join in for a thoughtful conversation on celebrating your wins, learning from challenges, and setting meaningful intentions for the year ahead. It’s all about closing the year with clarity and starting the next with purpose. Various areas to consider: Physical Health Mental Wellbeing Surroundings/Environment Hobbies/Joy Romance Friends/Family Finances Purpose/Career Spirituality Personal Growth…

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Step 12- Let's share the good stuff! 29:00

11 weeks ago29:00

29:00

Send us a text In this episode, we explore Step 12 from the Al-Anon perspective: “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.” What does it mean to experience a spiritual awakening, and how do we share our recovery journey with others without becoming preachy or overbearing? We'll discuss practical ways to live out Step 12, offer insights into spreading hope and support to others, and reflect on the power of service in strengthening our own recovery. Whether you're new to the program or a seasoned member, this conversation will inspire you to embrace Step 12 in your everyday life. Questions from Paths to recovery: *Have I experienced a spiritual awakening(s)?describe. *In what ways do I downplay my spiritual growth? What can help me to acknowledge it? *What have I received from Al-Anon that I would most like to share? *What are the different ways I can carr this message to others? *Did I see a friendly face early in my recovery? What can I do to be a friendly face to someone else? *What is the difference between carrying the message and giving advice? *When trying to carry the message, what have I experienced? *How can I recognize a cry for help without meddling in other people's affair? *How can I best carry the message to my family members, especially those who resist the ideas? *How can I practice these principles in my financial affairs? Is my job merel a means of earning money or an opportunity to practice my recovery? *What does the twelth step say to me about al-anon service work? *What part has service to al-anon played in my recovery? *What would change if I viewed service as my goal in every area of my life? *What are "these principles"? *How can I apply them in y daily life? *In what areas of my life do I need to start practicing these principles?What can I do this week to make a beginning? *How am I living the message of the program? *How am I a good example of al-anon recovery?…

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Addicted to More: Exploring Overconsumption in Everyday Life 21:01

12 weeks ago21:01

21:01

Send us a text In this episode, we dive into the idea that addiction goes beyond substances like drugs and alcohol. From social media scrolling to shopping sprees, binge-watching shows to overworking, we all grapple with behaviors rooted in overconsumption. Why do we crave 'more,' and how can we recognize when it becomes unhealthy? We'll explore the psychological and societal factors that fuel these habits and discuss ways to find balance and mindfulness in a world that constantly pushes us to consume. Whether it’s a little or a lot, we all have our struggles—let’s unpack them together.…

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Interview with Sylvia 45:56

13 weeks ago45:56

45:56

Send us a text

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Holiday Guide: Loving an Addict Without Losing Yourself 15:59

14 weeks ago15:59

15:59

Send us a text The holiday season can be a time of joy and connection, but for those with loved ones struggling with substance abuse, it often brings unique challenges. In this episode, we discuss practical strategies to protect your own peace and well-being during family gatherings. We’ll explore setting healthy boundaries, managing expectations, and finding support to navigate difficult emotions and situations. Whether it’s handling unpredictable behaviors, dealing with disappointment, or balancing self-care with family obligations, this episode offers guidance to help you approach the holidays with resilience, compassion, and confidence.…

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Step 11 27:56

15 weeks ago27:56

27:56

Send us a text Join us as we explore Step 11: 'Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.' In this episode, we dive deep into the role of spirituality in the healing journey, how to connect with a higher power in personal ways, and the transformative impact of prayer and meditation on our thoughts and actions. We’ll discuss practical approaches to building a spiritual routine, finding peace, and discovering guidance beyond ourselves to face life’s challenges with clarity and calm." This description highlights both the spiritual and practical aspects that make Step 11 so meaningful to Al-Anon members.…

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