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Quick Hits are 10-minute conversations designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to hear other people‘s thoughts on a variety of subjects. In February of 2021 I and the members of my mastermind group thought other people might enjoy listening in on some of the lively conversations we were having. But we realized that no one was going spend 90-minutes listening to us going on about anything and sometimes nothing. Instead, we decided to pick one top ...
 
A bite-sized daily podcast from the Culture and The Goods teams at Vox that goes wherever our (and your!) pop culture and consumerism curiosities take us. Hear the stories behind the news and trends, get personal about purchases, and find your next book or binge watch. New episodes daily, Monday to Friday. Each 15 minutes or less.
 
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I don’t think that forgiving is forgetting — that’s just not a thing. The human brain does not forget, especially if someone has caused you emotional pain. But it is possible to let go. You might remember how that person treated you, but you can let it stay in the past. Of course, that’s a lot easier to do when the person genuinely regrets their mi…
 
I was raised to believe that as long as I told the truth, it shouldn’t hurt someone's feelings. It took me longer than it should have to realize that just being true isn't enough to keep something from being hurtful. Once someone feels hurt or shamed they are not longer open to what you are saying. How do you approach those frank conversations — wh…
 
This question assumes that we actually think about entering an argument before we find ourselves already in it. But I thought if we talk about it, we just might put a yield sign in our brains that will help us think the next time we see an argument coming. Much of our conversation focused on understanding the purpose of the argument. Is it about be…
 
This was a super interesting conversation. We didn't come up with a great answer and I am left with more questions. How do you decide how much an employee's labor is worth? How do they know if they are being paid fairly? Why is compensation such a hush-hush thing? If an employee feels like they are being paid enough, is it okay for an employer to p…
 
I love investigating how language is actually used. When you look up these two words they don't seem that different. But in real life they are used really differently. To me, it seems like to be humble you have to have accomplished something and then not be a braggart about it. But meek is more about being a wall flower without an opinion or a voic…
 
This conversation came down to intention. If you are saying something nice to someone to get some benefit for your self - that is flattery and Mohan Ananda went so far as to say it is fraud. If you are saying something nice to genuinely make the other person feel good, that is a complement. Then I had more questions - how do you tell the difference…
 
This question ended up creating two sides in a way - those who are perfectly happy to connect with people via social media, text and technology and those who prefer the energy of being in the same room. But even those who are okay with building relationships via tech, out of sight, out of mind is a real thing. I consider all three of the guys on th…
 
The easiest action a leader can take when a team member isn’t performing well is to just let them go. But that can be a big mistake, especially when you have a high performer who has been going through a slump. My guests on this edition of Quick Hits — Brandon Mahoney, co-founder of the start-up Launch Point Labs; Jim Tam, head of the Dallas office…
 
Very rarely is does an "overnight" success actually happen that quickly. It is more common to hear someone say it took ten years of work to become an "overnight" success. We've talked on Quick Hits before about how do you know when you should quit, pivot or do something different. Today I wanted to talk about just sticking with it. Seeing it throug…
 
Just as I am posting this I am wondering about the difference between feeling foolish and feeling shame. That is a different conversation. I was particularly interested in this topic because I was feeling foolish about something I had done the week before (I share it in the video). I know from talking to lots of people that I'm not the only person …
 
We start our lives learning what is true about the world from our parents. Some good. Some bad. Some true. Some not. I recently saw a video where two parents "pranked" their toddler by leaving the house and "forgetting" her. They left a camera set up to film her (to me) heartbreaking reaction as she stood looking at the closed door holding her litt…
 
This might be the most abstract question I've ever asked on Quick Hits. There is something about living a meaningful life that should be decided after you've finished living it. But life having meaning feels more like a real time, right now, as we are living it thing. I wondered if maybe I'd jumped the philosophical shark but Philip Tate, APR, Fell…
 
You hear "experts" say that they schedule time for personal development. But do real people actually put time in the calendars to read, study or otherwise engage with their area of expertise? When I asked Christopher Jerjian and Michael Davis this question, both of them told me they read. Not fiction or for fun. Work related stuff. Michael has crea…
 
Simon Coles made the point that maybe it depends on whether you are working extra at your discretion or if the company expects you to clock out and continue working. Rhonda Bompensa-Zimmerman had a manager expressly telling her NOT to work off the clock. I didn't get to share during the conversation that I had the opposite experience. I had a boss …
 
This is a question that has been traipsing around in my brain since WAY before people in politics started talking about facts and alternate facts. If gravity is still just a theory (something for which we have not found evidence against), what are facts? The joke I tell when I do talks and trainings about communication and conflict resolution goes …
 
Golden handcuffs. Too exhausted to look for something different. The belief that the next job could be worse. Feeling like the job market is so bad they will never find another job. When I worked in corporate, I stayed in jobs because they were just that, jobs. I never believed they were a career. I just wanted to pay my bills. As challenging and u…
 
I’ve been guilty of it; just unloading, usually on a stranger, with WAY too much personal detail. Of course, then I felt super awkward about it. I’ve been on the other side too. Although I do my best to not cause the other person to feel awkward. Particularly if I’m sitting in public with a sign that says #Happy2Listen. What if it’s not a stranger …
 
You send an email with four questions and days later you might be lucky and get an answer to one of them. It is easy to assume that they are withholding information in a power move; that is a thing. I had it happen to me when I worked in corporate. It could also be that they are SO overwhelmed that your email simply isn’t on the list of panic thing…
 
We live in a social media world, whether we like it or not. With that comes a set of risks that require clear boundaries and a strong filter — otherwise it can suck the life out of you. You might have trouble sleeping because of a mean comment someone posted; you might find yourself spending hours of your day hitting refresh on a preoccupying news …
 
Myself and my guests on this edition of Quick Hits — Brand Scribed owner Jeff Glauser and executive coach Jennifer Elder — made a fun discovery during our conversation: We are all avid list makers. The three of us have all made that really long list of all the things we need to do and experienced the freeze effect that immediately follows it: This …
 
First we have to decide how to definition gossip. Does gossip involve simply relaying information that you heard from someone else? Is it only gossip when it involves repeating a rumor that you heard about another person? And if so, is that always harmful? Can gossip be helpful with the right intention? When I talk about confidentiality with my cli…
 
The answer isn’t clear logically, but we can tell emotionally. There can be a physical shift when a tough conversation becomes a fight. Your body might start to get tense, as if it has become aware that there is now a battle and the focus becomes winning rather than understanding. That’s when it is time to call time out. At that point, nothing prod…
 
Sometimes I wonder if it is hard to be thoughtful; to consider how words may affect someone. How can you phrase an opinion in a kind way that doesn’t lose the point of your message while not causing emotional harm? Are there times when expressing an opinion directly, regardless of impact, is the best approach? How does it vary based on the audience…
 
It can depend on who’s doing the yelling. If the boss does the screaming, it can be very hard, especially with others present. Then the screamer might feel shame and you’ve got to deal with the discomfort it creates. As author and entrepreneur Coach MJ, one of my panelists on this edition of Quick Hits, says, “We all understand how demeaning that m…
 
I grew up poor and rural and learned from an early age how to fix things around the house. I knew, for example, that if water is going out of the wrong side of the pump, the first thing to do is take a breath and think about why it might be doing that. Problem solving in the real-world functions in exactly the same way. We have to ask (1) what is c…
 
We all want to feel like we are part of a community. Sometimes we naturally click with a group of people; sometimes we find that need for acceptance leads us to diminish our sense of self in order to gain the approval of the group. The latter case is especially common in the corporate world, as my panelists — sales expert Kevin Wash, Zen Freight So…
 
What do you do ? There have been times in my life when I followed what other people told me to do, even though I knew that it wasn’t necessarily right for me. I didn’t trust myself enough, so I trusted them instead. And that was a mistake. At the same time, it’s not wise to outright disregard someone who gives you helpful feedback, especially if th…
 
A little context: Several weeks ago, I asked my Quick Hits panelists if it was fraudulent for someone to have two full-time, work-from-home jobs. The panel was split between employers who felt it was fraudulent and employees who said that they should be able to have a second job as long as they could do them both well. A commenter on my YouTube cha…
 
When I worked in the corporate world, I knew that as a woman I wasn’t allowed to get angry. That wasn’t a thing. In an attempt to control that anger, sometimes I would get so frustrated that I would end up in tears. (Men, on the other hand, don’t seem to have this problem. They get angry at work and it seems to be OK). I often think about how busin…
 
There are so many ways to communicate, hundreds within social media alone. The one you choose can greatly impact your personal and professional life, especially when you work with a number of different clients. You might text if it’s a real time issue. You might email if you need to send a longer message. You might text to forewarn your client that…
 
Gary Fredericks, Tim Hawkes and Connie Whitman are all major players in the sales game because they own their own businesses. They know that when questions start to feel sleazy and manipulative, that’s when asking has crossed the line into begging. On this edition of Quick Hits, they share their thoughts on how we can avoid crossing that line.We al…
 
I put this question to career coach Ed Samuel, business adviser Stewart Wiggins and IT Professional Atif Agha. Our conversation came back to one core principle: It’s all about leadership. Specifically the cultural priorities set by an organization’s leadership. They might retain toxic managers if (1) they make their decisions based on teammate surv…
 
I worked with someone once who said that it was his job to provide people with air support so that they could do their jobs. In other words, the best leaders know that they don’t have to be the smartest person in the room. They just have to know how to direct their team’s expertise so that everyone moves towards the same goal. Dr. Mohan Ananda, Jim…
 
We set standards for the kind of person we expect ourselves to be. When we feel that we haven’t done everything possible to meet those standards, we can find guilt settling in and making a home for itself deep in our chests. But we have to ask ourselves: Who sets those standards? Where do they come from? And most importantly: Do they matter? Are we…
 
Inflation or otherwise, sometime you have to (and should) raise your prices. But what about existing customers? Do they pay the new price or get to stay with the lower one? There is something to be said for loyalty. And if they have a contract, you likely won't be changing it. But when the contract renews, or if they don't have a contract in place,…
 
This is an age-old question. You don’t want to stop digging two feet from a gold mine. You also don’t want to spend years and obscene amounts of money to did up a whole mountain only to learn there is no gold. You don’t want to chase your loses and put good money after bad. You do want to be one of those success stories who is an “overnight success…
 
I don't know about you but I have a lot of "stuff" about giving up, quitting, not seeing things through. But working for myself, I've had to get over that and stop doing things more times than I can count. I wondered how other people dealt with that and this panel came through with some great responses. Pascal Derrien kicked us off by saying there …
 
After Brittney Wilson and I shared stories about times when we thought we were naive, JC Glick made an interesting point - does being naive mean you don't realize or consider there might be a different answer rather than just accepting a blatantly ridiculous answer because it is easier? Chason Forehand added that being naive requires trust - the ab…
 
You trusted someone. Now you don't. Does it happen all at once? Is there a conversation when you realize it? Chason Forehand and Brittany Wilson, shared that they are careful with who they trust and that people doing what they say they will is really important to them JC Glick, is on the other side of the spectrum in that he is willing to overlook …
 
I was very interested in what this all-male panel would have to say about imbalance in relationships and they did not disappoint. Could it be as Michael Sicuranza commented that some imbalance is to be expected and might not be a bad thing? Or is there something to Kevin Wash and Yonason Goldson's point that there is never a situation where imbalan…
 
This topic came up in the conversation after we turned off the recording and we decided to turn the recording back on and go again. The voice in our head and the stories we make up are how we define ourselves. And yet, many of us don't even notice the running commentary. Michael Davis, Karen Loomis, Daisy Cedeño MS, Dr Cole Galloway and I talked ab…
 
Creating accountability can be awkward and it's sometimes easier to just say "oh it didn't work out." But letting people take advantage of you isn't okay either. How do you decide when to put your foot down? My experience is that most people wait too long. Stewart Wiggins, Rick Alcantara, M.A. and Dr. Rhonda Bompensa-Zimmerman joined me for this ch…
 
It seems like the two skills should go together. The ability to understand and interact with others effectively must include the ability to relay understanding, knowledge and ideas through communication... right? And being "good" at communication (ie getting your point across) but clueless about how you are affecting others would be deemed "bad com…
 
The easiest answer is they pay on time and everyone's happy. But there is so much more to the client/vendor relationship. Feeling like you are delivering the value you are being paid for, not more, not less, is part of the equation. So is good communication (that seems to come up everywhere and is such a vague topic). There is also something about …
 
These two words are often used interchangeably. But they are actually different things. Is it possible to have one without the other or do they go hand-in-hand?Dr. Hannah Hartwell, Suki Jeffreys, Jim Shulman and Michael May joined me for this quick venture into how language is used and it is a great example of why what you think you said might not …
 
This question came up in a conversation with a client. How do those of us who actually provide a highly niche and valuable service set ourselves apart from those who have the bravado to say a big number and provide (how do I say this nicely) nonsense? In the coaches coaching coaches to coach coaches world (yes, sadly that is a thing) they preach th…
 
You might be surprised how many people are lonely. And it's not just who you might expect. I have clients who spend all day, every day talking to people and yet they feel disconnected and alone. Because of the type of work that I do, I tend to pick up on loneliness, even in casual conversations. When I've done #Happy2Listen there is an acute since …
 
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